“And if bridges gotta fall, then you’ll fall too”

My camera has slipped into a indefinite coma; or purgatory, if you will, until I decide if I should just spend more to get it fixed, or spend a little bit more than the latter amount to get my hands on a Micro Third. Which would mean officially pulling the plug on this current one.

My heart (and wallet) will ache, either way.

I miss whipping out my camera to capture shots of moments which I would want to imprint as a part of me, forever. I’ve a short-term memory, you see – I can recall insignificant moments of my life as a 3-year old (like this one instance when I was walking around the perimeter of my parents’ bed, in my Superman t-shirt with the little red cape attached to it, muttering to myself), but it would take me a guaranteed minimum of two minutes to recall what I did the day before last. I even miss digging around my bag, blindly feeling around the amount of rubbish I store daily just to feel for a blunt rectangular object; or even when I don’t find it, then get into a frenzy cos I thought I lost it.

It served me well for almost 2 years, or maybe a little bit more than that. I think that was the last birthday present my sister gave to me.

All I’m left with now is my Olympus RC 35, and as far as film cameras go, nothing can be more convenient than a digital camera. The uploading, the memory storage, and not forgetting the ridiculous prices for a roll of film these days.. yeah, I would still love to have a digital as my main source of photography indulgence. Film should only come into the picture as an additional luxury, right now.

I realized I just babbled on about such a material part of my life, but sometimes when you’ve lost all other immaterial wealth and you need to distract yourself from every bit of current reality, you tend to fall back on the more fine & detailed bits of your existence.

And if you happen to be wondering, I’m still not sure if things will be okay. But for the moment – and I do mean at this very second – I think stability might just set in.

Even if just for a while.

Lykke Li – Dance Dance Dance


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